2024 Word of the Year: Move

 

Every year, I chose a new word to help guide and inspire me. Last year’s word was Enjoy and while I’d like to say I had an ‘enjoyable’ year, I did not. It was a very hard year. Layoffs. Bureaucratic nightmares for 6 months trying to get healthcare and then, finding myself in the hospital. I’m good now, but I’m glad to see it over. 

It’s time to stop looking back in fear and anxiety and start looking ahead. Yes, I have to be careful as I recover, I tend to do too much, too fast. But I’m coming to the conclusion that it’s time to do more than reading novels and drinking tea. 

Move with care. 

I used to walk around my neighborhood lake almost everyday. I love the walk not just for exercise but for inspiration. Egrets, herons, beavers, otters, ducks, geese, deer and even coyotes live around the lake. The leaves changing, water reflections and sunsets give me food for my mind and soul. 

Obviously, after my hospital stay, I couldn’t walk everyday. I started out carefully walking around the neighborhood. But slowly, I’ve worked my way back to my ‘woods’. Today, I made it 1/2 way around the lake before the rain and snow started and it felt so good. 

Move with joy. 

I am a ‘maker’. To sit and read is fine for awhile, but I crave making things with my hands. It’s not just therapy, it’s joy. So it’s been hard to have to rest and see my studio work sit on the shelves. There’s so much I need to do: underglaze painting, bisque firing, glazing and final firing. 

To keep my spirits up, I’ve been crocheting. I know many might see it as an old fashioned ‘grandma’ thing but I’ve been doing some kind of work in fabric, thread, beads, and yarn all my life. I’ve embroidered, cross stitched, quilted, beaded and crocheted. I suck at sewing garments but I’ve made many pillows and throws in fabric and yarn. It’s my form of therapy and it works for me. 

Move with love. 

I was brought up to work and work hard. Move, move, move. Keep busy. Be productive. But I’ve begun to realize that pressure causes a lot of stress. My childhood coping skills of being a moving target served me then, but now, I need to make my own moves. I need to learn to move with love: for my mind, my body and my heart. 

What does that mean exactly? I’m not quite sure. But I do know it’s time to listen closer to my heart than my mind. Instead of jumping up every five minutes or rushing to and from the store or pushing myself to do more and make more, I need to breathe in. See the sun stream in. Feel the softness of the clay or yarn. Savor the walk while trying not to count my steps. 

Move. 

Move with care for myself, my body and my soul. 

Move with joy for making, baking and crocheting. 

Move with love for my family and myself. 

What moves you this year?

FOMO and BTDT

I realize I’ve been living too much in the online world lately. Watching posts about art events, art sales, art awards, gallery shows, I get sucked into the comparison vortex. And, let’s face it, that’s exactly what social media sites do to us all. And what does it cause? Anxiety. Stress. 

Ok, sometimes it’s great news for everyone. But we all know that’s few and far between. And while I post along with everyone, I try to keep an eye out for things that might be hard for others to see. But since I don’t know what’s going on in everyone’s life, something I might post could cause bad feelings, too, even if my intentions and yours are good. 

FOMO

Fear Of Missing Out is a common social media side effect for everyone. We see others on European vacations, getting awards, selling their art, even adding to their families. What do we do? Compare. Usually not favorably. 

Due to the recent roller coaster of life changes, I’ve chosen to stick close to home base. I took the summer off from the studio. I needed to cocoon and absorb and recharge. I did a lot of reading, walking, cleaning, clay and crocheting. And it was good. 

But I’ve been feeling FOMO lately. I see all the posts about Open Studios and Art Events coming up this fall that I’ll be missing. I’ve done many of those things in my art life: Open Studios, Gallery shows and group sales. Even though I had good reasons for not getting involved this year, some things, I miss. And some, not. 

BTDT

When I was in my 30’s, I did a monthly Gallery Gawk with three other women. Two were the age I am now and one of the things they seemed to constantly say is: Been There, Done That. I remember thinking, ok. Good for you, but I haven’t been there or done that yet. I hoped I would someday. 

And I did. I got to do those things I hoped for and more. And now what do I find myself saying? You got it. Been There. Done That. 

Some things I enjoyed. Some things I didn’t. I loved showing in galleries. Open studios was fun. Big group sales with all the hauling, set up and tear down, not so much. So the real question is: what do I want to do now? 

And with all the life changes, I’m not sure. 

What I do know: I love to create. 

I love clay and color and texture. 

I love making things. 

And seeing those things enjoyed by art lovers. 

So whether I’ve BTDT or am feeling FOMO, I’m going to keep making things. 

From small figures to pumpkin bread to crochet blankets to watercolor on clay.

Because I’m a maker. 

And Makers make. 

A New Season

 

It’s not officially Fall, but it feels like it. The breeze is cool. There are clouds in the sky and the temperatures are comfortable, finally. Taking a deep breath in and out, I’m savoring the change.  

It’s been a long, very hot summer and I’m glad to be done with it.

I was overwhelmed with life’s unexpected changes. My husband was laid off. I lost my medical coverage as a result and it took 6 months of bureaucratic nightmares for me to finally get healthcare coverage. All of this caused a lot of anxiety: sleepless nights, weight loss, emotional turmoil. I needed to find some ways to cope with it all. 

So in June, I declared I was taking the summer off. I needed a break physically and emotionally. I read a lot of silly romance novels and mysteries with my feet up resting and repairing my knee. And I did the 3 C’s: clay, crochet and cleaning as much as the very hot weather would allow. 

Dogs, cats, bunnies and fairies. Oh my. 

I didn’t have a plan. I just knew that wedging, rolling and throwing clay helped a little. Even when I was overwhelmed and angry, I made myself put my hands in clay. In the studio, I rolled out cats, dogs, bunnies and little fairies. I let the clay lead me into a safe space away from the stress and fear. 

And these small sculptures just started to appear and multiply. I’ve never made anything like them. But they made me smile and that was enough. So I just kept making them and a few months later, I have dozens. Almost enough to fill my kiln!

Welcoming new feelings and a new season. 

Today, it’s cloudy with a light, cool breeze. Just the right weather to fire up my kiln. It’s been so long since I’ve loaded it up and the biggest surprise was it was filled with new work! Dozens of little animals, some bowls and little plates I made with my granddaughter too. 

My anxiety is easing. The cooler weather is giving me an appetite again. We’re getting over the sadness and shock of our unexpected loss and life change. And embracing a new kind of life we’re both creating together. 

Sometimes life throws you into the unknown 

Floundering in the dark and fear

But then, slowly, the light gets in

A new season gives way to new life

Fall into it. 

August Already

 

A few months ago, I decided to take the summer off. So many things had changed that turned my life upside down. I needed time and space. I needed to let go of my old routine in order to figure out a new one.

At the beginning of all these unexpected life changes, I had a hard time. I wasn’t eating or sleeping or feeling very well. One of the biggest stresses was having my healthcare taken away with no warning. It pushed my anxiety through the roof. I had a hard time feeling safe to leave the house or spend time with friends. I had to learn to manage my anxiety by first accepting it and then working to find ways to ease it. 

I don’t know if I’m completely there yet, but I did find ways to help myself. I wrote about the three C’s: Clay, Crochet and Cleaning. These things plus a few others that help me are simple: walking in the park with my husband and darling Darby, reading books, cutting flowers and taking care of my grand babies. 

Walking. 

I’m very lucky to live close to a wonderful park filled with wildlife, green spaces, play spaces for children and adults. You might think that walking in the same park everyday would be boring but it’s not.

Everyday there’s something new to see: blackberries are out, young geese are learning to fly,  kids are laughing, Darby is sniffing and my grand baby is sleeping peacefully. 

Clay and Crochet. 

I found years ago that working with my hands was calming. Giving my body movement, gives my anxious mind a rest. The biggest plus, it’s fun too! 

So far, I’ve made crochet blankets in mint green, purple, pink, yellow, midnight blue and white. I’m working on a new one in peach. I love to crochet and am so glad my family loves their soft throws.

I’ve also been busy making new clay animals and fairies. I’ve done sculpture for decades, but right now, I needed something small and fun. These kitties, doggies, birds and fairies seem to be filling up my studio shelves. I’m hoping the hot weather will ease, so I can fire them soon. 

Beautiful Babies. 

I never thought I’d be one of ‘those’ grandmas. You know the ones who can’t stop bragging about their grandchildren. But, it’s official, I am. They call me ‘Gram’ after my Gram whom I loved dearly. My only hope is to pass on the love to the next generation. That said, here are some pics whether you want them or not. 

Anxiety is not a fun place to live. 

I knew it was up to me

To find my way out:

Walking, crocheting, playing with clay

And best of all, baby kisses and hugs.