As a big show deadline looms ahead, I'm tossing and turning. The wheels in my head are going full speed ahead and beyond the deadline, while my pottery wheel is at a complete stop.
My thoughts are full of to do lists. Unload the kiln. Tidy up the new pieces. Label the sculpture. Price my work and make an inventory list. Finish waxing my late friends raku pieces. Pack it all up. Then the questions pop out like ghosts on Halloween. Will everything in the kiln make it in one piece? Do I price my raku pieces differently than my glazed pieces? How am I going to pack, haul, deliver and set up all the pieces at the show? Can I lift and carry it all myself? What kind of parking will be available? How am I going to get my car into the new loading area?
No wonder I'm waking up at 5 am. I need to stop the wheels in my head before I crash.
Choose one thing I can do right now. Do it. Choose the next thing. Do that.
Saturday, I did my horsehair raku firing. Check.
Monday, I glazed my new bisque ware. Tuesday I loaded and fired my last glaze load for the show. Check and check.
Wednesday, I waxed my horsehair raku pieces. Check.
Today, I glued the hangers on my raku mask. Put on the hanging wire. Check.
Am I ready, yet? The answer: No.
Will I be ready? The truth is yes. I will be ready because I'm doing all the things that need to be done, one by one. And here's that word of the year again, faith, revealing itself. I have faith somewhere deep inside that it will all work out.
I can't stop my fears creeping up on me, but I can keep the faith and keep moving along.
Step by step.