To do or not to do

 

This is the question going through my mind lately. With life changes and health issues, I’ve had a lot to absorb and process these days. One of the main things I’m thinking about is my art and how it’s changed over the years. My first gallery show was in 2000, where I showed masks sculpted out of window screening. Yup, the kind of screening you buy at the home improvement store. 

From there, I made and showed screening or clay masks in boxes that contained a copper repose landscape and a story that tied all the pieces together. Some were free standing and some hung on the wall. 

A gift that changed my art and life.

During an open studio years ago, a very sweet couple came to see my art. They had bought one of my copper masks and spotted some of my clay sculptures. Wondering why they hadn’t seen these in the gallery, I told them I only had a few because without a kiln, I was only able to get the pieces fired by a kind art teacher. They then offered me their kiln and insisted I take the wheel they had, too. 

That led to a few years of clay classes where I learned to throw and glaze. And after that, throwing became my biggest focus. I threw and showed and sold mostly functional pieces: mugs, bowls and vases. A few sculptural pieces snuck in but not a lot.  

Now what?

That’s the question I’ve been asking myself a lot these days. With all the life and health changes throwing just doesn’t feel the same. I still love clay, so I did what I could physically do, making some lily vases, leaves and small sculptures. 

When my small sculptures sold well last year, I saw it as a sign to make more. I did. I made a lot more. But what I found out is that making more doesn’t mean selling more. Even though I did sell almost all of my birds(made in 2020) and polar bears(made in 2023), I had a hard time making more. It just didn’t feel the same to ‘remake’ my work as it did to make a new idea in clay. I know this may sound weird, but I struggled with copying myself. 

Perhaps, production work just doesn’t work for me. My art has certainly evolved over the years, I worried about that, too. I think that’s why I wanted to produce more to prove I could and to sell more. 

To do or not to do, what do I do? 

To force myself into the studio to copy myself isn’t working. 

Maybe that’s the problem: production instead of creating.

Making more didn’t lead to more sales.  

Maybe, just maybe less is more. 

May Days

 

Where did May go? As they say, time flys while you’re having fun, I’d say yes and sometimes time just flys. After a year of shocking life changes and health challenges, I’ve been having some fun which is a lovely surprise. 

Although it’s a lot of work, potting and planting my yard and patio is always fun. Going to the garden store is a delightful field trip. I love wandering through the isles of bright flowers and colorful hanging baskets. I couldn’t wait to get them home and planted. 

Grandchildren are grand indeed. 

This month also found my husband and I taking care of 2 of our 3 little ones. We had 3 year old, Cieran for four days. He is such a sweet and smart little boy. We went to the park one day and watched his pre-school fun run. He did art in my studio, cars of course, since that’s his favorite movie right now. 

On Thursdays, we get to have 16 month old Madden here. It’s so much fun to see him grow and learn and develop from little baby to toddler. We always take him on a walk to the park. He’s walking with confidence now and one of the best things is his desire to explore. 

Health and art. 

Finally, this month I had my appointment with my new PCP which if you don’t know(and I didn’t until recently) is my Primary Care Physician. In my new ‘healthcare’ world, this is the person who oversees all of my healthcare needs. I looked forward to this appointment and the chance to talk to one person about all my recent health care issues. I hoping this will make my experiences with this new healthcare system much easier. 

The studio is always my happy place. I’m so glad when I’m in there working with colors and clay. This week, I’m making new birds and playing with new ideas for little sculptures. And wondering about more paintings in a watercolor technique on clay. 

May Days fly by

Like the birds in the sky

Perhaps it’s time to sit and savor

The colors of the season

And let it all bloom, including me. 

Showing Up

 

I can’t believe I haven’t written a blog in almost a month. And on the other hand, I can believe it. I’ve been very busy. And that’s a very good thing for me because this past year with all the life changes and health issues, I’ve been the opposite of busy. While I’ve had good reason to rest, recuperate and reassess the way I live my life, it was time to get moving. 

This is what it looked like in my studio last week. I had a very big ceramics show this last weekend. I had a lot to do to get ready on my end: making work, pricing work, inventory and packing.

Setting Up. 

I’m lucky I had my wonderful husband to help me haul my bins from home to the show and back home again. I used to do it all myself, but this year I needed help. Once it was all stacked in front of my shelves, it was time for me to set up my display. 

I admit, I love doing the display part of this multiphase job. I’ve always loved decorating my spaces whether it’s my office at work, my kids play spaces or my home. So setting up my work to display is fun. 

Standing Up.

Doing this show involves much more than my own little set of shelves and pedestals. It takes hundreds of people, including myself, to set up the display areas, sales area, gallery area, kids clay booth and more. I worked in the gallery area setting up the display and keeping it looking good throughout the show. I love working doing gallery display. 

I also worked ‘manning’ the gallery and group booth. It’s a lot of standing and walking and waiting, too. Again, with my past year, I was very worried I wouldn’t be able to manage the work load. I was worried I’d have to pull out at the last minute. But I did it! 

Not only did I handle my own work, I did my work shifts and I sold some of my own work, too. 

My biggest win

Wasn’t showing my work

It was showing up, doing the work

Talking to other artists

And feeling strong. 

Blooming.

I look out my window and the whole world seems to be blooming. Bright red flowers cover my Camilla. Small pink blossoms scatter around the plum tree. Here and there daffodils I planted long ago add a pop of bright yellow. 

Inside, I’m working in my studio and recovering from health issues. I work a little slower but even so, new things are popping up. Like this silly, google-eyed bird. Where did he come from? I don’t know. Where will he go? Again, I don’t know. 

Experimenting. 

I used to have a schedule: throwing on Tuesday, handbuilding on Wednesday but that’s not happening now. I notice that I’m less interested in throwing functional pieces and more interested in handbuilding and sculptural pieces. 

Not sure why this is happening and that’s ok. I started out doing sculpture and learned to throw when I was gifted with a wheel. In the last 10 years, throwing has been the focus. But now, the focus has slowly shifted again. I have to say, I’m having fun with these quirky little figures that are popping up. 

Recovering. 

I’ve had health issues this year that I’ve never had before. I’ll admit, it’s been scary. Seeing different doctors every time is weird, too. But this week, I had my first virtual doctor visit and I have to say it was wonderful. The doctor truly listened to my concerns and offered support and solutions. I’m grateful. 

I see flowers blooming all around me

And it gives me hope

My body recovered and strong

New work crazy and colorful 

Everything moving and growing.  

March Forth!

It’s March. The month of trees budding, daffodils blooming and St. Patrick’s Day. And time to move the clocks forward in my part of the planet. And the first day of Spring is this week!

With all the changes in and around my life, I’ve struggled a bit to keep going at times. But when I saw someone post, “march forth” on March fourth, I took it as my ‘marching’ orders. It’s time. Time for me to quit looking back in sadness and fear and start moving forward. 

Marching Forth in the Studio. 

In the last blog, I had a picture of a cone 6 kiln load. Even after all these years working in clay, I can’t predict how pieces will turn out in the final glaze firing. In that firing, some pieces cracked, some stuck to the kiln stilts and a piece warped. I did get 3 beautiful new red Lily Vases. 

Last week, I glazed and fired some big black and white leaf platters, 3 little polar bears and a new cat figure. I’m so glad this time, everything came out perfect! Whew!

Springing Forward.  

This year has had many challenges and the last few weeks have been no exception. My darling Darby got into something when I let him out for his last potty break. It was raining and I couldn’t see what he was doing but a trip to the vet was necessary. He’s fine now, but it was scary. 

I’ve been doing a lot of experimenting in the studio this year. Instead of throwing functional pieces, I’ve been doodling with sculpture again. Sculpture is where I started with clay and now I’m back to doing it again. This time, bigger animals with more detail. Where these will go? I don’t know. And that’s ok. 

It’s time to claim my new life chapter

Is throwing out and hand building in?

Work taking a backseat to fun?

I’ll take a clue from the daffodils,

Let it bloom

Light Moves

 

The sun is streaming in my windows this afternoon and it makes me smile. I feel warm and cozy and safe. These are feelings I haven’t felt in a while, quite a while. But rather than focus on the past, I want to focus on here and now. 

Like this morning’s walk in the park with my grandson, Madden. It was clear and cool but not cold. The ducks and geese were all busy swimming in the lake. As my husband and I walked along enjoying the views, Madden took a short nap after having his pumpkin pancakes for breakfast. 

Glazing and Firing, finally. 

Slowly, the shelves in my studio were getting full and that makes me happy. Because of the recent health issues, it’s taken me longer than usual to get to the point of having enough work to glaze and fill the kiln. But today, I did it!

It’s truly a mix of work. Some thrown bowls I did back in August. There are little plates and big plates I worked on with my granddaughter, Meyer for her little brother, Madden. Some new red Lily Vases. A few new figures, which I’ll admit, I’m not too excited about but we’ll see. 

Lightening Up. 

It’s been a heavy year for me and my family. A very heavy year: lay offs, health insurance problems, unexpected health issues, hospitalization and recovery. For months, I’ve felt overwhelmed and traumatized by all of it. 

But today, walking through the park, I felt lighter. Breathing in the air and sunshine, I felt healthy and strong. And I looked forward to loading the kiln and firing new pieces.

It’s time to let the sunshine in

To breathe sweet air, give light baby kisses

And feel my heart, soul and feet

Making light moves 

Again

Moving with Love

 

I can’t believe it, February is here! I love looking for the hints of spring peeking out all around on my walks around the park. And it’s almost Valentine’s Day. I’ll admit, I love hearts and flowers and chocolate, so this is one of my favorite times of year.

But with all I’ve been through this year, it’s feeling a little different. I’m taking things a bit slower.  I’m rushing less and resting more. I’m enjoying both the comfort of my sunny nook and the calm of my studio. 

Making is my form of zen. 

Whether I’m baking, crocheting or working with clay, I’m in my happy place. In the last few weeks, I’ve been underglazing and bisque firing. First, I add a layer of color and some details to my pieces and bisque fire them. Then, I add washes to each piece so the details stand out and fire them again.

There’s something so soothing about laying the black wash on each piece. Then after they dry, wiping it away to reveal the intricate details. Today, I loaded the kiln for the second firing to set the underglazes. 

Moving on gently. 

One thing I’m learning this year is patience. It’s never been my strong suit, I’ll admit. I’ve always walked fast and pushed myself to do more and more. But now I know, I need to listen to my body more and not my head. Instead of moving to a busy bee voice, I need to move with gentleness and care and love.   

Watching the black underglaze flow

Seeking and filling every little vein of the leaf

Revealing nature’s hidden designs

Slows me and shows me the depth of life

In this month of love, perhaps, it’s time to show some to myself.