Evil

 

I sit here with the sunshine streaming in behind me and I wonder, why? 

And yet, I know the answers: power and greed breed evil. 

Evil that kills without shame and steals without guilt. 

But what is almost unbearable is the cost: mothers and fathers and children killed. 

I haven’t written about what’s happening in our country this way because I couldn’t find the right words. While others did and I applauded them, I felt numb. 

I know overwhelm when I feel it. I’ve been there before: COVID, layoffs, illness and major surgery, an ambulance ride to the hospital, my husband recovering from RSV. 

But this, what’s going on in our country is more than I can take right now. Go ahead and call me a coward, but right now, this is the best I can do. Now to be fair, I have made signs and protested and marched. I’d write my representatives but in the emails they send, all they want from me is money. This makes me mad, too.

Excuse me, dear Senator or Congressman, you are making more than me and from my tax dollars, too. How dare you ask me for money to do the job I am paying you to do!

Sunshine, peace and coffee cake. 

Is that too much to ask? Really?? I don’t have grand goals. I just want a few things from life and from my country. And most of it doesn’t cost anyone a dime. 

Warmth and light from the sun in the sky. Maybe a few daffodils along the way. 

Soft voices and warm hearts, peace, health and safety for myself, my husband, my grandchildren and my sweet doggie.

Sweetness and cinnamon filling the house with warmth and coffee cake. 

Living a life with simple joys and safety and gratitude. And a little art. 

But YOU, you know who YOU are: take your billions, pay your taxes, do your time. 

Your evil abuses will be remembered forever. 

A stain that no amount of money or gilded arch can ever wash away. 

But the brave and the courageous and the true people, will be celebrated long after you are gone. 

And, you will be gone. 

2026 Word of the Year: Relief

I’ll be the first to admit, this new word of the year seems odd. Especially considering the times we are living in right now. Or rather the time we are enduring right now. 

It’s chaotic. 

It’s awful. 

It’s scary. 

It’s the exact opposite of relief. 

The opposite of the word relief is: distress, extreme anxiety, sorrow, or pain.

Yeah. I know I feel it. We all do. 

So why in the world did the universe send me the word: relief?

I do not know. All I know is it’s there blinking at me: Relief. Relief. Relief. 

Now it’s up to me to figure it out. My best guess, like maybe all of us, I want and need relief from all of this crazy. But it feels deeper, like a touchstone, a power or maybe a place to land.

Rest and relief. 

The last few years have been filled with doctor visits, antibiotics and pain. What was diagnosed as a bladder issue was, in fact, a colon issue. This required major surgery and, also, major recovery. I’m not good at resting, but I had to do it anyway. 

The challenge was to find ways to create as I recovered. I couldn’t throw on the wheel but I could draw and paint and crochet. So that’s what I did and it helped me heal and thrive. I took a free online drawing/painting session and had fun with crayons and watercolor and ink. When we were showing what we did at the end of class, one person said my painting felt to her like relief.

Real relief. 

On my way through recovery, I found my way back to where I started. Years ago, I made clay, metal and screening masks and showed them in galleries around town. I loved mask making and even taught classes for children and adults in schools and at a local art museum. 

One day in my studio, I realized while I couldn’t throw clay, I could roll it out into a slab. I made a small face and set it aside. More faces appeared and grew into flowers. 

It took me a while to figure it out but I finally got it. I was creating clay reliefs. My need to rest and recover had led me back to what I’ve always loved. Faces and Masks. 

And my new word of the year: Relief. 

My hope is that this year, in this country, we will all recover from this chaos. 

And that would be a real relief. 

Looking for Life

It’s a bright, sunny day here in Oregon which is something to celebrate. Our weather is typically cloudy and cool with maybe some rain. Climate change has changed it up in the last few years but I’m still a true Oregonian. When it rains, I smile. 

Sigh. I’d like to be smiling right now. How about you? It seems all around us there are dark clouds gathering. Anger rising. Threats to our lives and security. A crazy maniac in the big White House who is followed by crooks interested in stealing money and selling secrets. 

It’s overwhelming at times. And I don’t know about you, but I refuse to get mired in the muck. 

Pulling myself up and out. 

One way I’ve managed to save my creative soul and spirit is to get out into nature. Walking isn’t just about exercise, it’s about moving my body, mind and soul into the real world of nature. Trees and birds and squirrels who live in peaceful contentment rooted in the earth around them. Thankfully, I have a beautiful park in my neighborhood to walk around everyday. 

Hearing the kids play on the swings. 

Seeing the Heron floating in the water. 

Looking down at an oak leaf and thinking of how I could form it in clay. 

Breathe in life. Real life. 

Step by step around the lake I go, watching and hearing and hoping. I smile at the people walking by me. Heal in my dog to let them pass. And hope, no matter what new craziness happens in our country today, that they are ok. That we are all safe. That all of our days get better. That this craziness will end peacefully and safely. 

Let’s all take a deep breath together. 

Breathe in beauty.

Breathe in love.

Breathe in life. 

We will get through this.

By looking for life and beauty all around us. 

 

Creating Strength and Clarity

 

The bad TV show continues to spew out episodes daily in our country. It’s hard to watch the episodes spin out angry threats and misinformation. I watch and listen and  support the courts and truthful reporting. I have to say upfront, my husband has been a broadcast news reporter for decades and I trust his information.

Trusted sources give me more than information, they give me strength and clarity. I make it a goal to stay out of the chaotic news feeding frenzy. If you want that too, I recommend reading, Turner’s Take here on Substack. https://miketurner921.substack.com/p/hands-off?r=2j4566

Clay and crochet and clarity. 

As an artist, my work gives me a lot of time alone. As I roll and knead and push and pull the clay, my head clears. I let the clay lead me where it wants to go. This week, each piece formed into a bird. One small. One larger. 

I didn’t draw it or design it or force it. The clay moved with my hands and fingers into the shape of a small little bird and a crow. They’re  not finished yet and that’s ok. Wings and details will be added as they dry a bit. But I guess I’m not surprised a crow flew into my studio this week. I do love crows. We have many who nest in our great big fir tree. They fly to the back porch cover to take loud splashing baths. I smile with delight every time.   

Everyday, I crochet. All during my illness and now during this crazy time, I find the rhythm of hook and yarn is like meditation that calms my body and soothes my mind. Lately, I’m making Christmas stockings at the request of a local shelter for women and children. I’ve never made crochet stockings before, so it’s a new creative challenge for me. 

(Ok, I don’t do patterns, I usually wing it. But I’m trying out patterns and using some stash and new yarn.) The one on the bottom left is in progress. 

Creating strength. 

Especially now, with the weak posturing loudly, I look for quiet strength. Senators and judges who use their strength and the law against the lawless. People raising their voices and writing words to protest. 

Here’s what I found out after I formed my birds this week. Birds symbolize freedom, something we are all fighting for right now. And crows are symbols of transformation, wisdom, strength, intelligence and the ability to see beyond the ordinary. 

I don’t know about you, but I need that right now. 

Maybe that’s why I found two more birds I’d done weeks ago and forgotten. 

I need to feel strong and free and see above the headlines. 

Quiet. Please.

As a child, these words posted in my local library brought peace. I remember reading them gave me a sense of safety and shelter and calm. And I know in my heart and soul that is exactly what I need right now. 

In July, the roof of my house was ripped off and completely replaced. We’ve lived in this home we designed for almost 30 years, so it was time for a new roof. While I looked forward to the new roof, I had no idea what it would be like to live through the transition from old to new. It was a VERY loud and messy process. 

In September, the front siding of our house was ripped off and completely replaced along with a small section on one side. After that was done, the entire house was re-painted including trim and the front door. Again, it was a loud and messy process. 

New strength. 

I love my new roof, new skylights and new vents. I love the strong, updated siding. I love the new paint color, new window trim and bright red door. But most of all, I love feeling even more securely sheltered in the home I designed and built three decades ago. 

Getting here has not been without its bumps and bruises. Siding and skylights were not in our renovating plans. But what I’m learning, especially this year, is plans change. And sometimes they change for the better. 

Creating challenge. 

With all the noise and mess and disruption, it was hard to find time, space and quiet to work in my studio or on my wheel. Glaze firing was put on hold due to air quality warnings and high outside temperatures. Yes, it was frustrating and I’ll admit scary. Because, my lifeline and connection to calm is creating. 

So I painted a new bowl and two new birds.  I re-arranged my studio. And I waited as calmly as I could, which I’ll admit included pacing, grouching and some unneeded snacking. But last week, before house painting began, I did manage to throw a few teacups. I made a new leaf platter. And this week, during the trim painting of the house, I trimmed and pull some handles. 

Balancing the see saw. 

I remember long ago, an expert described life balance, not as a balance beam, but as a see saw. It is so simple and so true. 

Life is not a straight, narrow path but a thrilling ride of quick ups and downs with short stops in the middle. Studio work helps me balance and yet, it is a constant seesaw ride: good weather for clay to dry vs (not) too hot, studio time vs marketing and selling.  

Then, of course, there is social media, politics, pandemics, forest fires, bad air quality and roofing and painting and 2020. 

 

What a see saw to live on everyday. A challenge that requires creativity and strength. And most of all, for me, a little quiet. Please.