FOMO and BTDT

I realize I’ve been living too much in the online world lately. Watching posts about art events, art sales, art awards, gallery shows, I get sucked into the comparison vortex. And, let’s face it, that’s exactly what social media sites do to us all. And what does it cause? Anxiety. Stress. 

Ok, sometimes it’s great news for everyone. But we all know that’s few and far between. And while I post along with everyone, I try to keep an eye out for things that might be hard for others to see. But since I don’t know what’s going on in everyone’s life, something I might post could cause bad feelings, too, even if my intentions and yours are good. 

FOMO

Fear Of Missing Out is a common social media side effect for everyone. We see others on European vacations, getting awards, selling their art, even adding to their families. What do we do? Compare. Usually not favorably. 

Due to the recent roller coaster of life changes, I’ve chosen to stick close to home base. I took the summer off from the studio. I needed to cocoon and absorb and recharge. I did a lot of reading, walking, cleaning, clay and crocheting. And it was good. 

But I’ve been feeling FOMO lately. I see all the posts about Open Studios and Art Events coming up this fall that I’ll be missing. I’ve done many of those things in my art life: Open Studios, Gallery shows and group sales. Even though I had good reasons for not getting involved this year, some things, I miss. And some, not. 

BTDT

When I was in my 30’s, I did a monthly Gallery Gawk with three other women. Two were the age I am now and one of the things they seemed to constantly say is: Been There, Done That. I remember thinking, ok. Good for you, but I haven’t been there or done that yet. I hoped I would someday. 

And I did. I got to do those things I hoped for and more. And now what do I find myself saying? You got it. Been There. Done That. 

Some things I enjoyed. Some things I didn’t. I loved showing in galleries. Open studios was fun. Big group sales with all the hauling, set up and tear down, not so much. So the real question is: what do I want to do now? 

And with all the life changes, I’m not sure. 

What I do know: I love to create. 

I love clay and color and texture. 

I love making things. 

And seeing those things enjoyed by art lovers. 

So whether I’ve BTDT or am feeling FOMO, I’m going to keep making things. 

From small figures to pumpkin bread to crochet blankets to watercolor on clay.

Because I’m a maker. 

And Makers make. 

A New Season

 

It’s not officially Fall, but it feels like it. The breeze is cool. There are clouds in the sky and the temperatures are comfortable, finally. Taking a deep breath in and out, I’m savoring the change.  

It’s been a long, very hot summer and I’m glad to be done with it.

I was overwhelmed with life’s unexpected changes. My husband was laid off. I lost my medical coverage as a result and it took 6 months of bureaucratic nightmares for me to finally get healthcare coverage. All of this caused a lot of anxiety: sleepless nights, weight loss, emotional turmoil. I needed to find some ways to cope with it all. 

So in June, I declared I was taking the summer off. I needed a break physically and emotionally. I read a lot of silly romance novels and mysteries with my feet up resting and repairing my knee. And I did the 3 C’s: clay, crochet and cleaning as much as the very hot weather would allow. 

Dogs, cats, bunnies and fairies. Oh my. 

I didn’t have a plan. I just knew that wedging, rolling and throwing clay helped a little. Even when I was overwhelmed and angry, I made myself put my hands in clay. In the studio, I rolled out cats, dogs, bunnies and little fairies. I let the clay lead me into a safe space away from the stress and fear. 

And these small sculptures just started to appear and multiply. I’ve never made anything like them. But they made me smile and that was enough. So I just kept making them and a few months later, I have dozens. Almost enough to fill my kiln!

Welcoming new feelings and a new season. 

Today, it’s cloudy with a light, cool breeze. Just the right weather to fire up my kiln. It’s been so long since I’ve loaded it up and the biggest surprise was it was filled with new work! Dozens of little animals, some bowls and little plates I made with my granddaughter too. 

My anxiety is easing. The cooler weather is giving me an appetite again. We’re getting over the sadness and shock of our unexpected loss and life change. And embracing a new kind of life we’re both creating together. 

Sometimes life throws you into the unknown 

Floundering in the dark and fear

But then, slowly, the light gets in

A new season gives way to new life

Fall into it.